I pray several times a day. You know, the quick “Lord, tell me what to say in this meeting” or “Please don’t make me miss this train” prayers. When I sit down to really pray, I start with thanking God for my blessings, and then I go into my prayer list. I pray for everyone. My husband, of course, my parents and brothers, friends and family who have needs, even you all who leave prayer requests for me here on The Feisty House (I love to pray for you! It gives me so much joy!)
Amazingly enough, even though I love prayer and I believe it’s my spiritual gift…I neglect to pray for myself. Sure, I ask God to keep me safe and that stuff, but I don’t pray for myself nearly as often or as hard as I should. It’s a blessing that I have family members who are always on their knees and pray for me all the time, but I know for a fact I will not grow in the Lord if I do not do a better job of praying for myself.
The last time I remember really praying for myself was Lent and a few times here and there after that. And while it’s important that I continue to pray for my issues with fear, I have some very specific needs that I need to bring to God on my own behalf.
The Bible says we are to “rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and give thanks in all circumstances.” Prayer is how we keep ourselves from succumbing from the daily distractions that tempt us to lose sight of our larger goals. As women with big ideas and even bigger dreams, we must constantly and consistently pray that we remain focused and driven. Otherwise, we run the risk of throwing in the towel when the going gets tough.
On Thursday night, after days of feeling uninspired and physically exhausted (I’ve had a pretty intense work schedule), I went into our bedroom and started writing in my prayer journal. And then I stopped once realized that I haven’t actually prayed for myself in ages. I mean eyes closed, hands reaching out to God prayed. And so I did. I prayed for God to bless me with five specific things in five specific areas of my life: my career, my finances, and my physical, emotional and spiritual health.
With all my planning and striving and dreaming of becoming an entrepreneur someday, I do not pray about my business goals as often as I should. The business I’m growing is an opportunity to use my passions and my spiritual gifts to provide for my family and design the life I’ve always dreamed of. I should be praying about something that important every single day. I know exactly what I want to do with The Feisty House, and I know that it’s going to take a lot of hard work and dedication and discipline to get there. I need to pray that I’m moving in the right direction. I need to pray for wisdom in making decisions. I need to pray that I get the right clients and build the right networks. I need to pray for discipline and consistency (both of which I tend to struggle with). And I’m starting a business while also working a full-time job…can you see why I need prayer?
I want to save $30,000 while I’m in my thirties. I also want to be completely debt-free in five years, and my I want to earn $6,000 a month from my own business in 2016. I have no idea how I’m going to be able to do all that. I’m not very good with money although I’m getting better (I’m really impulsive, and I don’t know the difference between “needs” and “wants”). I’m praying that God helps me to bring my spending into control, focus on my long-term goals, and put something away for savings each and every paycheck. I have a solid budget for the rest of the year, and I’m just praying that I stick to that and resist the temptation to spend over what I’ve budgeted each month.
I’ve always taken my health for granted. I’ve never been seriously ill. I’ve been blessed with natural muscle tone, natural strength, and a very fast metabolism. But all of that will continue to slow down and wear away as I get older. I also lack flexibility and stamina. I’m more tired than I think I should be. Knowing this, I’ve been pressuring myself to work out, but it’s so difficult for me to get mentally prepared to exercise. Even now that I wake up earlier and have the time to work out, I still can’t bring myself to do it. So on Thursday I prayed that God would motivate me to get out and become more active. I cancelled my home workout subscription and I’ll be heading to the gym with Quentin every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday morning. I’m starting off really slowly and deliberately, and by adopting Quentin’s workout schedule, I’m know that he will be able to help motivate me to get to the gym as well.
I’m still working on controlling my fears, and I’m so pleased with how far God has already taken me. I’m much more confident and a lot less anxious, but I still have a way to go. It is a daily struggle, and as such, I need to be more vigilant about bringing my fears to God daily. I’m also praying that I make fewer judgments and decisions based solely on how I feel. Like I said, I can be impulsive, and while being emotional and passionate can be great for creating ideas, it’s not always a good way to think through and then execute a plan. Even in marriage, emotions have their place, but they don’t belong in every discussion I have with my husband. When I think less about how I feel at a certain moment and more about what was actually said or done, you won’t believe how many times that has diffused what could have become a situation. I don’t want my emotions to lead my decision-making; instead, I’m praying that God would lead me into all things and show me how to respond to the things that take place in my life.
Like I said at the beginning of this post, I know for a fact I will not grow in the Lord if I do not do a better job of praying for myself. I prayed for myself a lot when I was first starting out as an adult, partly because I had no money and no job prospects, but I grew so much as a result. I don’t want to have to experience difficulty in order to build my relationship with God. I have things to do, and I can’t afford a setback! So lately I’ve been feeling like I’m at a good place with the Lord but that it’s time for me to actively get to a better place in our relationship. There’s more for me to experience, more for Him to teach and prove to me. We should always strive to grow in grace. Like any relationship, our relationship with God should continue to evolve and grow and deepen the longer we know Him.
Yes, we should pray for others, but we also need to pray for ourselves. It isn’t an act of selfishness. It’s necessary to pray for yourself in order to keep yourself on track and moving forward. Do you set aside time to pray for yourself? If not, why not try right now!
Photo Source: Rivet & Sway